Well. I finally got over my stupid social phobia about going to the gym and went last night.
I do not know why I have a problem with certain social situations and not others, but the gym is one of my problem areas.
Perhaps I feel inadequate being a little overweight and having the pasty white skin of a 16-hr-per-day-behind-a-TFT nerd.
I overcame my phobic reaction by putting a positive image of a similarly fearful situation that ended with me feeling good about myself.
The image was of going to Dogo Onsen hot baths, overcomming my phear of public nudity and having a fun time bathing there. I came away feeling happy and relaxed.
Once inside the gym I had a look around, even though without my glasses most people were fuzzy around the edges, and discovered that all the people at the gym are losers!
Yes. What do I have to phear. I mean, look at the gays peacocking near the free-weights. Or how about that metro-sexual man, more in love with his own reflection than anything else, stretching in the mirror and thinking he is all that in his gucci sports gear. Loser! Lol!
Or the uncorodinated large bottomed women in the sterpaerobic class that somehow think their falling about constitutes Jazzercise. And who I later caught having a cigarette outside.
Or even the dotty 60 year old man who seemed to just walk between the machines and not actually use them.
And then I saw that there were other, slightly over-weight, pale skinned, keyboard-jockeys obviously, like me, trying to become just that extra femtometre closer to a healthy lifestyle.
I left feeling a little elated and went home and ate a treat. Some Spam [the real kind, not the digital] that I had picked up a while ago at an expat shop. [Cost me about € 5!]
So I have taken the first step towards a better version of me.
What next I wonder?